There is no Death, Only the Force
by jedi.princess.superhero
Summary: "He's dead, Hera!" Kanan screamed, suddenly angry. Not at her, not at the Grand Inquisitor, not even at himself. He was angry at the Force for taking away such a hopeful, bright-eyed child, who only wanted to help and love. (Warning: major character death)
1. Chapter 1

**So I haven't posted anything in a while but a little while ago I thought about what would happen if during Fire across the Galaxy, the Inquisitor had actually killed Ezra. I decided to write it because for some reason I love to cause myself pain...**

 **So thank you for reading and enjoy! Also, I do not own Star Wars Rebels or any of it's characters.**

* * *

Kanan felt the star Destroyer shake and let out a breath. He had tears prickling in his eyes as his thoughts drifted back to Ezra.

He forced himself to turn around and look down at the platform his apprentice had fallen onto.

Ezra was pale, and still and Kanan reached out hesitantly with the Force even though he knew what he would find. Ezra didn't respond, and the hole in Kanan's chest throbbed at the coldness that now consumed him.

He could feel his sudden adrenaline fading quickly, and jumped down to the platform before he passed out from exhaustion. It was then he could hear Hera frantically calling Ezra from the communicator. She was pleading with the child they had taken in, the child who had trusted them, the child they had willingly brought into war. She had no idea that he would never be able to respond, that he would be silent forever...

When the Star Destroyer rumbled again he grabbed the com as gently as he could from Ezra's belt, from Ezra's lifeless body.

" _Ezra?! Are you out there?_ " Hera demanded.

"Hera," Kanan began, but his throat closed up and he couldn't bring himself to say anymore.

Hera didn't seem to hear his despair, obviously just recognizing Kanan's voice was enough to send her into high spirits.

" _Kanan! Thank the Force!_ " she exclaimed, and Kanan winced because she was so happy, so joyful, but she had no idea. " _We have to leave now! Can you make it to the Ghost?_ "

"You don't have time! I'll find another way out," Kanan assured, but then realized he had said I, and not we. He looked down at his padawan; it almost looked like the child was only asleep. He was so young and innocent and vulnerable. Kanan almost believed that any minute now, Ezra's eyes would open, and he'd be able to see those crystal clear blue orbs one more time, and hear his childlike laughter one more time. But, Kanan knew the truth. Ezra wasn't sleeping, he wasn't going to wake up, and everything he never realized he needed was gone.

" _No, Kanan. I'm not leaving you again!_ " Hera declared over the sound of blaster fire.

"You won't! I promise you, Hera. Just go!" Kanan demanded. He had already lost Ezra today, he would not lose Hera too.

Pushing aside his grief, and gathering up all his strength, he slung the boy over his shoulder.

Kanan almost collapsed. Not because of the weight, years on the streets fending for himself and fighting starvation made sure Ezra's weight was not a difficultly. It was just too wrong.

Ezra was too limp.

Ezra was too cold.

Ezra was too quiet.

He didn't make a sound when Kanan leaped back up onto the bridge.

The rest was a blur, he don't know how he was able to make it to the Inquisitor's Tie Fighter.

It felt like an eternity when he gently laid Ezra down in the small space.

He could feel his breaths beginning to quicken, he was seconds away from breaking, but it wasn't over yet.

He had to get Ezra away from this destruction. He had to get him to safety. Not that it mattered anymore. The least he could do was take Ezra to a peaceful final resting place.

He gripped the steering controls tightly at that thought, and he felt as though he was about to pass out, or throw up, or cry, or do all three at once until Hera's voice brought him back down to reality.

He barely registered the sudden Rebel Fleet that miraculously came to their rescue. He hadn't even realized he had docked and jumped to hyperspace.

Gently, lovingly, Kanan wrapped his arms around the boy. One hand cradling Ezra's head in such an intimate, personal, way every Jedi on the counsel would have been disgusted. He felt for a pulse, he listened for breath, he tried to feel the rise and fall of his chest. Nothing. Nothing.

He couldn't help the cry that escaped his throat. This wasn't supposed to happen. He was supposed to protect him. He was his Master. Ezra was his responsibility.

And because of his failure an innocent child, who had already endured so much pain, had been killed, had died.

"Kanan? Love, are you in there?" Hera called, knocking on the tie fighter's hatch.

He heard the creaking of metal as the hatch was slowly opened, and then heard a horrified gasp. He looked up at her. The grief evident in his eyes. All her joy of being reunited with him disappeared. Kanan and Hera just stared at each other for a long moment, and Kanan swore he could see self blame and guilt begin to swirl around her.

"Get him up," Hera demanded reaching for him. Kanan felt his arms obey, even though he was in a daze.

Zeb was there instantly at Hera's orders, pulling the boy out of the fighter and with a gentleness Kanan had never seen from the Lasat laying him on the ground. Sabine hovered hesitantly, hands in front of her mouth, watching wordlessly.

Kanan moved faster than he ever had to escape the prison of the metal ship and knelt at Ezra's side.

Hera was fussing over him, grasping at him, murmuring about how they could get a medic.

Kanan was deathly still; this was not a nightmare, as much so he wished it was. He could not wake up from this horror. He was frozen as Hera spazzed until finally he couldn't take it anymore.

"He's dead, Hera!" Kanan screamed, suddenly angry. Not at her, not at the Grand Inquisitor, not even at himself. He was angry at the Force for taking away such a hopeful, bright-eyed child, who only wanted to help and love.

Sabine and Zeb tensed and flinched back, suprised by the brutality of Kanan's behavior.

"No!" Hera shook her head furiously, as tears began to form in her eyes. "He can't be! He can't!"

She found it ironically cruel, that in order gain back one member of her family, she had to lose another.

Sabine was crying, Kanan noted, and Zeb was taking in slow, raging breaths.

Kanan let the sounds melt away. The heart-wrenching sobs from Hera, the cries from Sabine, the screams of fury from Zeb, the sound of a door behind them opening, Chopper anxiously warbling, and then a soft, strong, female voice, trying to get their attention.

Kanan blocked it all out and let his head fall against Ezra's chest. His hands were cradling the boy close, and he had no intention of ever letting go.

It was in that moment, as he was sobbing over the cold body of the boy he had loved so dearly, that he realized why his master had sacrificed herself for him.

The pain of losing a padawan, the pain of losing a son, was just too much for him to bear.


	2. Chapter 2

**So in this I decided to have Ezra encounter Qui-Gon Jin because we already know Qui-Gon mastered the Force Ghost concept thanks to Yoda in Revenge of the Sith. Also, I kind of took a few creative liberties on how the whole Force Ghost things works!**

 **I hope you enjoy! And once again I do not own Star Wars Rebels or any of it's characters.**

* * *

 _Ezra._

Dozens of voices called out to him. Some familiar, some not.

 _Ezra_.

He tried to ignore them. He was just so tired.

 _Ezra!_

But they were all persistent. Urging him to wake up, to open his eyes.

He faintly heard the clashing of lightsabers, but it was fading away quickly.

Suddenly, a cold washed over him. As if a layers of snow had gently settled on top of him.

The voices grew louder, until it felt like everyone in the galaxy was screaming his name.

He shot up, with a cry on his lips.

His chest was quaking, and when he looked around and realized he was sitting in complete darkness, his breathing intensified.

"Kanan?" he called, desperately, fumbling to stand on his feet.

There was no response. All the voices had suddenly gone silent, leaving him alone in the oblivion.

"Kanan!" he tried again.

Nothing. There was nothing. Everywhere he turned all he saw was black, eerie emptiness.

A small sob escaped his throat.

He didn't understand. Where was he?Where was Kanan? What was going on?

"Hello there, young one."

Ezra sharply spun around in order to face the voice.

A tall man wearing Jedi Robes, with a soft smile, and kind eyes looked down at him

"Who are you? Where am I?" he asked immediately.

The older man gave Ezra the saddest and most compassionate smile he'd ever seen. And it sent an ache of premonition into his heart.

"I am Jedi Master Qui-Gon Jinn. Do not worry, youngling. I am a friend. And you are?" the older man asked casually, as if they were in a market rather than complete and total darkness. He completely ignored Ezra's second question.

"I-I'm Ezra," the boy managed, even more confused than before. "Am I having a vision? What is this? I was just on the Star Destroyer and I was fighting the Inquisitor when-"

Ezra faltered when he felt another wave of cold wash over him. But not the cold that usually came with the Dark Side. It was a quiet, peaceful, cold that spread through him until physically he could feel nothing. It whispered to him, and tugged at his mind, urging him to rest, to be still.

It was when Qui Gon offered the boy another sympathetic look that Ezra knew.

"I'm dead, aren't I?" he mumbled, not even bothering to look at Qui-Gon for the answer.

"There is no death. There is only the Force." the Jedi answered immediately, laying his hand on Ezra's shoulder.

But it felt wrong. It was only the ghost of a touch, void of any warmth.

Ezra felt tears pricking at his eyes and did his best to blink them away.

"That doesn't make me feel any better," Ezra grumbled, earning a quiet chuckle from the Qui-Gon.

"I know what you mean, Ezra."

Ezra felt another sob make it's way out, because he reminded Ezra so much of Kanan. And Ezra couldn't feel his friend anymore. He hadn't realized he much reliant he had gotten to Kanan's presence always with him until it was gone. Being separated after Kanan had been captured was once thing, because even if he was far, Ezra could still feel him. But now, Ezra just felt empty.

He didn't even know if Kanan was alright.

"Your thoughts dwell on your master," Quin-Gon pointed out.

"If he was dead, would he be here too? If he isn't here, does that mean he's okay?" Ezra wondered, hopefully.

"Honestly, I do not know," Qui-Gon admitted, as Ezra's shoulders slumped. "But, I can feel that hope shines brightly in you. So, hold on to it. Trust in the Force."

"What's the point of trusting in the Force if all it's ever done is hurt me? First it took away my parents, then Kanan, and then I get him back only to die! I'll never be able to see him again! Or Hera, or Zeb or Sabine! Even Chopper. They're all gone." Ezra exclaimed, brushing Qui-Gon off him.

"If you don't want to trust in the Force, then what do you want to do?" Qui-Gon asked after a moment. He didn't sound mad. In fact, the understanding in the older man's tone made Ezra think he wasn't alone in harboring a bitterness towards the Force.

"I just want, Kanan." Ezra whimpered, not even caring about how weak and childish he sounded. He didn't even care when the tears came back again. He didn't even try to stop them from flowing down his cheeks. "I don't want to be here! I don't want to be alone! I just want Kanan!"

Ezra sunk to the floor, desperation choking him and leaving him void of any feeling.

"I understand, Ezra," Qui-Gon sat down next to the child and laid a hand on his back, comfortingly. "There I many I miss as well. My own Master, my friends, my padawan."

Ezra's tears didn't slow, as Qui-Gon tried to console him, but he was patient with Ezra, letting him cry until he was able to gather himself again.

"If you want to give up on the Force, I won't stop you, but there might be a way to be reunited with those you've lost."

Ezra looked up at Qui-Gon, as he wiped his tears away.

"What do you mean?"

"Like I said before, their is no death. There is only the Force." Qui-Gon began. "The Force is still strong with you, Ezra. You may feel distant from The Force, but there is always a way to connect with those who have it."

"So, you're saying I can see Kanan again?" Ezra questioned.

"I'm saying, there's hope." Qui-Gon answered, simply.

"Can-can you teach me?" Ezra practically begged.

"If you're willing to learn," was all the Jedi said.

"Thank you," Ezra whispered and a slight nod was the only affirmation he got that Qui-Gon had heard him.

"Let us begin."

* * *

It had been just like meditation.

He was sitting on his knees, like Kanan did all the time.

Qui-Gon said all Ezra had to do was reach out and try to find Kanan.

It seemed easy enough at first, but the longer Ezra did it the more far away Kanan's presence felt.

"This isn't working," Ezra complained.

"Don't give up, Ezra." Qui-Gon encouraged, compassionately.

Ezra withheld a sigh and closed his eyes again. He was determined to keep searching.

He was pleasantly surprised when something stirred inside him. A familiar presence. Kanan.

He opened his eyes hesitantly and was shocked to find himself in Kanan's cabin on the Ghost.

It looked exactly like he remembered and it was so refreshing to Ezra after hours of sitting in total darkness.

Kanan was sitting on his meditation chair as if it were a regular day, and to Ezra it was the most amazing sight he'd ever seen in his entire life.

"Kanan!" he cried out, excitedly.

The older man looked up suddenly, and it was then Ezra realized there was a strange scar on Kanan's face covering his eyes and the bridge of his nose. Before Ezra could say anything else Kanan gasped.

"Ezra?" he whispered, but then shook his head. "No, this isn't possible."

"Kanan, it's really me! It's Ezra." Ezra exclaimed, taking a few steps forward.

"I don't understand, I can sense your presence but-" Kanan faltered.

"I don't get it either, but it's me. I'm here." Ezra smiled and he didn't even try to hide it. Being back with Kanan even after only a few short hours made him feel completely elated. He practically wrapped his Force signature around Kanan and had no intention of ever letting go.

"Ezra," Kanan's voice broke, and the older man reached a shaking hand out. "How is this possible?"

"Come on, Kanan. You're the one who taught me that there's no death. There's only the Force." Ezra teased, even as an anxious feeling began to settle in his stomach. Ezra noticed that Kanan had yet to open his eyes.

"Now you listen to me," Kanan gave a tense chuckle.

"Kanan, what-what happened to your eyes? Did the Inquisitor do this?" Ezra asked abruptly. Obviously Kanan hadn't been expecting his question, because the older man flinched and unconsciously reached up to touch his scar.

"No. The Inquisitor died the same night you-" Kanan faltered again and had to swallow the lump that had formed in his throat.

"I don't understand." Ezra admitted as his unease intensified.

"I'm blind, Ezra." Kanan admitted, finally opening his eyes to reveal two milky white orbs. The familiar teal of his Master's eyes was now dull and seemingly lifeless. Ezra felt his heart constrict at the sight. "And right now I wish more than anything I could gain back my sight just to see you standing in front of me."

"Kanan, I don't understand. If the Inquisitor didn't do that, than who did? Only a few hours ago we were on the Star Destroyer and you were fine!" Ezra protested.

"Ezra," Kanan shook his head and reached forward again. Ezra's hand met his and Ezra almost let out a sob when Kanan passed right through him. "You've been dead for two years."

"What?" Ezra gasped. "No, that's not-that doesn't make sense."

"Kid, you have no idea how many nights I stayed up wishing you were still here. You have no idea how much I've missed you, how much we've missed you."

"I miss you too." Ezra mumbled.

He suddenly had the overwhelming desire to hug the older man, but he knew it would mean nothing. Kanan couldn't see him, Kanan couldn't feel him. What was the point?

"Ezra, I'm sorry." Kanan blurted.

"Kanan, you have nothing to be sorry for." Ezra quickly interrupted.

"No, Ezra listen. I let you down. You died because I failed, and I never wanted to hurt you. I wanted to protect you. Not just because you were my padawan, but because you were...because I cared about you so much, kid."

"I don't blame you, Kanan. It wasn't your fault. It's time for you to forgive yourself, Master." Ezra assured reaching out to place his hand on Kanan's arm. He didn't even care if Kanan couldn't feel it, he needed to reach out to his friend in anyway possible. Kanan could've sworn he felt the ghost of a touch, and he smiled.

Just as quickly as his smile appeared it faded when he felt Ezra's Force signature slipping away.

"Ezra, no." he mumbled. He began to panic. He had just gotten Ezra back, he couldn't lose him again. Life without his padawan had been empty, and a few short minutes of hearing his voice just wasn't enough. "Kanan, I'm losing you!" Ezra cried. "I'm sorry, I can't stay. Just please promise me something!"

"Anything." Kanan declared.

"Promise me you won't stop fighting okay? Stop the Empire! I know if anyone can do it you guys can." Ezra managed, even though his vision was starting to blur and he could feel Kanan getting further and further away.

"I promise," Kanan assured, with emotion thick in his voice. He barely even registered the tears flowing from his unseeing eyes, he hadn't even known he could still cry.

"And tell Hera, Sabine and Zeb, and Chopper that I'll miss them!" Ezra cried as the Force pulled at him, letting him know his time was up.

"I love you guys so much." Ezra whispered.

And then he was violently ripped away from the world of living.

He was violently ripped away from Kanan and it left Ezra feeling as though there was a giant hole deep inside his very soul.

He looked up, and Qui-Gon was no longer sitting in front of him.

He was alone again, in the black abyss. Being separated from Kanan felt like he had died for a second time.

He collapsed as sorrow barreled into him like a speeder. He let himself fall into the darkness as he began to sob.

And on the other side, in the land of the living, Kanan Jarrus was suffering the same pain as his late padawan. Together, but separated, they both wept, mourning over the loss of each other.


End file.
